The first time it happened to me was on March 17th, 2017 in Atlantic City. I wrote about this incident as a review on Yelp a few days after it happened. I also went to therapy for a few months afterwards - I had a lot of difficulty grasping what happened and felt very angry all the time. Fast forward to July 19th, 2017 …. I got an email from Yelp HQ, attached here, about my review:
I remember I got this email near the end of my work day (I’m in eastern time zone). I remember immediately sniffling and tearing up, and felt so relieved. It was the end of the work day so I could rush out to openly sob and my coworkers wouldn’t see me as such a mess. I felt really upset and angry...they weren’t “allegations”, this was a true story. Also, it was a review of MY experience there, why would “legal authorities” need to validate my experience? Why did they need to remove it? The email fro Yelp HQ also included the review I had wrote -- bringing it all back again when I received the email. You may view my now-removed Yelp review as follows:
My second incident happened last weekend. God damn it, it happened again. What the fuck, why, I don’t get it. My boyfriend and I were walking in Greenwich Village around 8:30pm to meet my parents for dinner at a restaurant. They came into NYC from NJ. We were walking when I felt a hand very deliberately grab a handful of my butt. I learned from my previous experience - I turned around and ran after the man. I yelled after him: “WHY DID YOU TOUCH ME LIKE THAT. WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT, WHY DO YOU THINK THAT’S OK”. I caught up to him at the corner and he turned around to me. He looked me in the eye, and he said “OK look. I’m sorry.” I responded, “SORRY?!?! WHY DID YOU GRAB ME IN THE FIRST PLACE? WHAT MAKES YOU THINK IT’S OK?” My boyfriend went up to him, echoing me, and told the man to not go anywhere so we could call the police. This is when the man started to become aggressive, yelling at us - “LOOK NO STOP IT”. My boyfriend put his hand on the man’s shoulder so he couldn’t get away, while he reached into his pocket for his cell phone. The man pushed my boyfriend away, yelling “DON’T TOUCH ME”. I yelled back, “YOU TOUCHED ME, WHAT MADE YOU THINK THAT WAS OK?” The man pushed my boyfriend, he continued yelling at us. (I don’t quite remember what he was yelling, and what exactly my boyfriend yelled back - this part is foggy). There were two other men at the corner, eating pizza where we were. It was at this time that they shouted over to my boyfriend and me, “OK guys, whatever, just let it go”. I felt so disappointed by these bystanders. Especially here in NYC!
I thought I had a lot more faith in my fellow New Yorkers. I felt really defeated. I felt so disheartened. I told my boyfriend - “Let’s just go...let’s just go….” The man cursed us off a bit more and then walked away. My boyfriend and I stood at that corner for a bit longer, and I just sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. I was so angry. I felt so disgusted, I felt like throwing up. My body actually felt numb! The only thing that helped me collect my composure and stop crying was the fact that I knew my parents were waiting at the restaurant for us.
When we eventually made it to the restaurant, my parents were already standing outside. My mom took one look at me, saw that my eyes and nose were red and know right away I was crying -- “What happened, Jenny?”
I told her everything.
I am still very upset and mad. I just don’t understand what makes people think this is ok. I don’t understand why this stuff happens. I just don’t get it.